Chapter 10 You Are

So we played a show at a church tonight, and it was beautiful. God was adored, the gospel was treasured, compassion kids were sponsored. Like I said, beautiful. And it’s night like these that get me sort of weepy. I start asking God under my breath, “Why do I get to do this? You and I both know I don’t deserve it. You know I’ve got nothing to offer you that you didn’t first give to me, so what on earth Lord? Me? You sure about this?”

But it’s true. Right now we’re on the Inside and In Between Tour, and I’ve been totally amazed. Amazed at how God has kept me close to my wife over the phone, how He’s spoken through us and in spite of us, how people have come to a better understanding of the gospel, and how God has moved in hearts to initiate people to partner with Compassion in releasing children from poverty in Jesus’ name. It’s unbelievable.

And on a night like tonight this chorus seems easy. “I give you all of me, for all you are, here I am, take me apart. Take me apart.” But it’s only easy, because the most glorious thing happened tonight. I forgot about myself. I know, totally crazy. But I did. I think it might have just been for a few minutes or seconds or so, but it really did happen. For one brief shining moment, God took up my thoughts and affections and freed me from the prison of myself.

And that’s kind of what makes this prayer work. So many of us try so hard to get better, do more, change the world, and all we ever seem to do is fall flat on our back. And its sad because I feel like no one ever told us that we’ll never make it that way. It’s just not possible. The only true path to freedom is adoration. The forgetting of oneself in the awe of another is the only place we can be changed, for to change into something that we are not, we must see what it is to what we must aspire.

Or in other words, “the worth and excellency of a soul is measured by the objects of its love.” -Henry Scougal
Or in other words, “We are forms of all the things we love.” -Jars of Clay
Or in other words, “but we with unveiled faces, beholding God’s glory, are being transformed from one degree of glory to another.” -2 Corinthians 3:18
Or in other words, we become whatever we love. Love mean and sordid things and so you will be. Love God, and the most wondrous thing will happen, Scougal explains, the life of God will show up in the soul of man.

And so that’s all this song is saying. Don’t try to be better for God. Don’t try to figure out all the things you need to change, just fix your eyes on Jesus. He is your life. He is the one who saves. He is at the center of all things, and He holds all things together. And as you love Him, as you fawn over all that He is, He’ll begin to change all that you are. Or as my pastor says, “for every time you look at yourself, take ten looks at Jesus.” Don’t look at what your hands have done, look at what his have done for you. And as you fix your eyes on Jesus tonight, and on all that He is, I pray that you slowly but surely, forget about all that you are.

May the infinity of who He is , so fill your finite heart and mind that you find yourself being crammed out entirely.